He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Randomize
