Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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