It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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