you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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