nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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