Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I feel like abortions should bother me more
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
They are going to name an STD after you.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Randomize
