New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
