Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
