So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize
