she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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