on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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