I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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