plz talk dirty to me
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
