awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
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