No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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