therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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