That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
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