god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
