Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Randomize
