Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Randomize
