Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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