There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Randomize
