Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
where am i from again
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Randomize
