Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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