That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
