We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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