everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
