Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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