I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
