And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
