I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once