nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Randomize
