i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize