Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
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