he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
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