He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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