i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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