that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize
