wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
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Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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