im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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