I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
i need some magic done to my vagina
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Randomize
