You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize