i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
