How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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