can we get nightvision for the apartment?
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Randomize