Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
