??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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