i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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