Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
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