you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
