that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
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